Beautiful Nightmare…

This is a beautiful song…Love it so much-very meaningful. Japanese song by Kiroro ( BESTFRIEND).And here is the translated version. U guys shud go n check this song out. Dedicated to my best friends (you know who you are). I LOVE YOU ALL!!

I don’t have to worry anymore, cause you will be by my side when I cry
You always smile at me
I am blessed because you always shine before me
Things that we have missed hastily at time, that’s the way it is
Faces that always being looked at
Forever hugging each other
Your smile has helped me endless time, you know
Thank you thank you Best Friend

These plenty happiness that I felt at this moment
All the friends that I have here, you the best present
I am blessed because you always be by our side
Surely things that I have accomplished here, those things too give me strength (change to strength)
Faces that always being looked at
Forever hugging each other
All of your smile has helped me endless time, you know
Thank you thank you Best Friend

Things that we have missed hastily at time, that’s the way it is
Faces that always being looked at
Forever hugging each other
Your smile has helped me endless time, you know
Thank you thank you Best Friend

Always always always my Best Friend

Yay..I manage to get a tan. But I forgot that the sun in Malaysia especially.. never give any mercy to your skin. Now, I am in pain. Shud have wear Tabir SURia dat day…sunblock la tu. Holidays started already. Campus now so quiet but tonite there are sounds of fireworks blasting breaking the silence of midnite. It is the independence day for Malaysia.MERDEKA..MERDEKA..MERDEKA!..yea…merdeka..shud appreciate the independence that our country have.hmm..since when pula I am SO patriotic this..hahaha
Uhm..sleepy but can’t sleep. Strange. Eyes tired but my brain is still so very awake…Ouch,hard to move my arms, the skin like plastic d.hangus…kakakaka…but worth it la…sunburn or no sunburn..as long as I got my Shampoo Boi wit me…hehehe..honeymoon end d..left only honeystars…

One day . . . a wealthy family man took his son on a trip to the country, so he could have his son see how poor country people live.

They stayed one day and one night in the home of a very humble farmer. At the end of the trip, and when they were back home, the father asked his son, “What did you think of the trip?”

The son replied, “Very nice dad.”

Then the father asked his son, “Did you notice how poor they were?”

The son replied, “Yes.”

The father continued asking, “What did you learn?”

The son responded, “I learned that we have one dog in our house, and they have four.

Also, we have a fountain in our garden, but they have a stream that has no end.

And we have imported lamps in our garden . . . where they have the stars!

And our garden goes to the edge of our property. But they have the entire horizon as their back yard!”

At the end of the son’s reply the father was speechless.

His son then said, “Thank you dad for showing me how poor we really are.”

Isn’t it true that all depends on the lens you use to see life?

One can ask himself what would happen if we give thanks for what we have instead of always asking for more.

Learn to appreciate what you have. Wealth is all in one’s point of view.

Tubellaria…sounds like wat? umbrella? tube?…its a type of worm. Now my head is full of worms…hahaha.can’t imagine how would it look like. eww! Nah, it is just today every info that been absorbed by my dear brain is about animals. Its all about zoology. Found it very fascinating at first but then NOW it so complicated. So much things to memorise…ehehe..understand la not memorise. Just today that I learn about Science Learning and Teaching. No science knowledge should be memorise but then again our educational system really acquire students to memorise practically everything…hahaha..ironically.

Rainy days la here now. Then I have to rummage under my bed (hahaha, sounds like under my bed is totally like jungle there) to find my beautiful umbrella. Hah, beautiful?? I shud find another adjective to describe it la. The besi of the umbrella almost half are patah already which now the umbrella which suppose to be round jadi semicircle sudah. SO memalukan! Anyway, it is still can be used although when I am walking around campus with dat umbrella, sum eyes will be staring…. I dunno la the umbrella or the pretty girl who is using it…hahaha..perasan pula! Ok back to the umbrella story. Even tho it is terlalu buruk but masih berguna la, like dis one rainy day..it was really pouring. The dear umbrella of mine save me from being wet while walking back to my hostel where as some ppl were soaked from head to toe walking in the rain. Useful juga la my umbrella yang sudah patah2 tu..hehehe.

Well, the umbrella really reminds me to be grateful la. To be thankful for wat I have in my life, wat keeps me goin thru dis journey, who loves me for who I am, who keep supporting me all the time..and all the little things that I never realize before this…hmm..this rainy season made me an observer and reflector la pula..hahaha. Well, sometimes I grumble too much but being a human myself I can’t escape it. But I can constantly remind myself not to la.

Hungry, lonely, and blurred about what the purpose of living. I don’t know whether this is a good idea to state those feelings in my blog. But, the world would never care. So, why should I? When you have the power to connect to the world at your fingertips but then there’s no one I MEAN not a single soul out there to give you the approriate response. I guess its better off communicate with the non-living things rather than being desperate trying to communicate with the living things especially those species called Homo sapiens. Rationalize and be optimistic but that I’ve tried and believe me there are times you can’t even think straight especially when your body is in the starvation mode.

I tried to be independent but in this world, we always have to interact and connect. It is the way of life…hah, the “so-called circle of life”. Even the link and interaction between the abiotic and biotic component in the ecology system also shows how important these links and interaction are. I am trying hard to understand this and apply it. But, duh! I guess I am giving myself the false hope which only can lead to depression.

Things happen but why should it be at the wrong time and wrong place. I asked this as if somebody could give me an answer. I am “invisible” now. Nobody and I tell you NOBODY is there. But then the questions comes in like bullets from a rifle shot to my neurones searching for the answer that I will never find. Maybe there is something that I can do…maybe there is…Think my dear brain, think!!

I guess I know what I should do. The temporary shut down by my surroundings is just the perfect inspiration for me to do something stupid right now. But not now, won’t do it right now. I wonder where does all the Homo sapiens whom I guess I know them as a…what the word again..uhm “friends”? I think I get that right but I never know.. NEVER ever know the definition of that ever again. Maybe the MY dictionary also have to be revised again. I am just full of resentment now. Damn! I just wish I got a coke and some “sweets” right now.

I need someone to talk to, but who?
I need someone to lean on to, but who?
My needs, your needs, our needs
It’s all there
But there is always a question mark at the end of the day

A smile on a face never show what is happening inside,
A frown that you see would never reveal the sadness that resides,
The thought of having something sometimes sent a relief to the soul,
Somehow it may be lost and can be a mystery left unsolved.

The pain is there,
killing me slowly from within
Trapped in a place where everything seems out of reach,
Denial and ignorance keep me from suffering;
Trying to live in a euphoric world
which rather only a fantasy that I can never live.

haiya…I can barely open my eyes now. Went to play for a badminton match, which I or rather we ( I played double) lost…hmm..buat sakit badan only. So long din play now like orang tua already. Penat! But at least I burned more calories today since I din eat anything for the whole day until now except for a bar of chocolate for the instant energy boost….ahakz..diet la.kunun!

Travelled using public transport today, actually not only today la, usually memang public transport also. But, I don’t know why the moments in the bus was like eternity..so long..suffocated by the b.o of people and not mention the noise inside the bus. Which really potrays how Malaysians are truly rude sometimes…haha..NOT Malaysia, Truly Asia ; but now Malaysia, Truly Rude - asia…ahakz!

Erm, tonite the finals for Akademi Fantasia which I guess the craze among most Malaysians now…maybe I termasuk also la…but I supported some of them because of their talents and the chance for them that they should get in order to shine in the future…and not to mention cos of friendship…huhu..One of the finalist is my friend, I am sure la now she was my friend..because I don’t think she can remember the times especially back in kindergarden..hahaha..I think if not because of her, my first few weeks in the kindergarden would be filled with activity like crying because scared baru masuk tadika kan, normal la small kids..but i remember she marah me (cos I sat beside her in class ba).. she said ” Jangan nangis lagi ba!”…HAhahaHA..and from that moment onward I never cry in class anymore…hahaha..stupid anecdote to be shared..but anyway..Good Luck Marsha and as well as the rest of u guys ( Felix, Amylea, Mawi )..and I guess I wont be watching also..malas..like tau oredi who gonna win..business is still business…Money do all the talking…

hurmm…tired! need massage badly..Lactic acid is forming and concentrating in my muscles…ekeleh..hahahaha..crap!

after supper ni..kenyang la pula. rasa guilty pula makan lewat macam ni. hungry ba tadi mau buat macam mana lagi kan. If u are hungry then u shud eat,if u are sleepy then u shud sleep..muahaha..prinsip hidup yang sungguh tidak produktif. but, logik bah tu.
I dunno la for the past few days rajin pula saya pi baca blog my frens in frenster. Apa ba guna ni blog anyway…huhu..Bunyi cam free gila, maka banyak kerja mau buat ni. Mesti rajin this sem, tidak boleh malas. Cakap ja ma tu…tahap kemalasan tatap juga lebih dari usaha ni.
As I walk past the hallway to my lecture hall today, got this one smell…hmm, wet paint pula. but, I dunno why does it smell so nice. Macam drug addict pula suka smell bau macam tu. Terfikir pula my stupid mind this how if somebody like me jadi drug addict. hahaha…ntah apa2 jak.
The campus now are well-lit, decorated, all these are the preparation for the coming convo week. Most of my seniors will be coming back to campus again, not as a student but as a graduate now. Some of them are in the working world already, but ada juga yang still ampai-ampai, lugai-lugai tiada kerja. This really get me thinking does a degree really can secure your life or the experience and knowledge learned during your student life that will make a difference?
I heard stories la. Even though one may graduate with a first class degree, but without the charisma, good communication skills and experience that could differentiate you as an individual, one may not secure a good job as well as a bright future. I am not saying that I know what it takes to survive out there, but at least this would be a reminder to all of us who are still studying.
Huhu..since when pula pandai berfalsampah ni..tulung la..anyway, sometimes I think I should really ask my brain to work those neurons. really think la- think about things yang patut difikir la. but sometimes or rather all the time maybe for useless things…sampai kadang2 boleh jadi paranoid over simple things. hurm??